"Take it easy, Angie"

Since I try to be as authentic as possible on here I'm going to be honest. I haven't memorized any of my verses. I should call them something other than Scripture memory verses. They are simply verses that I need at the moment.

I have a brand new Key Word Study Bible that I've had for quite some time. It's barely been cracked opened. And I have never read a Bible with Red Letters. This is really neat. You've probably read them and can't believe I'm making such a big deal about it. Well, I can't tell you how it affected me when I was flipping through it. Those words affected me differently knowing they are the Words of Jesus Himself.

These words popped off the page when I read them:
"Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, trust also in me." (John 14:1)

I could hear Jesus tell me straight. Do not LET your hearts be troubled. So I have a choice to either trust Him or not? It's up to me to let myself get all worked up about the concerns that are weighing so heavily on my heart. I guess I knew it, but I have a hard time letting go.

Sometimes I get so passionate about what I think God wants that I can't just sit back doing nothing. I don't want my life to change. I hold on to relationships for too long and I'm finally learning that my begging and pleading won't change the outcome. I don't know how to be passive and I'm not convinced God would want me to be anyway. I know He told me not to let my heart be troubled, but to trust in Him and in His plan.

The opposite of "troubled" is calm and easy. I think He wants me to calm down. Sounds easy, right? Yes, if I make the right choice.

I better settle down and let God be God.  (Especially this week!)

it's never too late

My friend and I had our own little Sisterhood thing going last night when we were discussing midlife, our kids, our marriages and the choices we have made. There are so many profound lines in Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood. We came to the conclusion that when it all comes down to it, we believe we will be asked the most important question at the end of our lives:

Did I love enough?

In the movie, Sandra B. asked her Dad, "Daddy, did you get loved enough?"

He responded, "What's enough?"

Then he asked his daughter, "My question is, did you? ... It's never too late."

Did I love enough?

We both know the goal in life isn't to be happy; It's to learn to love the unloveable. When we are tempted to run away from relationships, wherever we go we will be there. Wherever we go WE will be there. If I asked my husband and/or my kids if they were loved enough I wonder what they would say? I'm not so sure I'd want to hear the answer. At the end of the day, I can't control how well I've been loved (although I don't think we are supposed to be loved enough by anyone here on earth), but I can control how well I love people... especially the unloveable. The only One who will love us "enough" is Jesus. It's the enough that makes us desperate for the only One who is capable.

"The road back is humility."

I pray that if you do not feel like you are being loved enough, you will go to the Only One who can satisfy that need and fill that space in your heart that is meant for God alone. I also pray that we can with God's help... love the unloveable.

Please watch this:


All my love,
Angie

"NO"

I had a situation happen to me last night that I'm still trying to wrap my mind around. Occasionally I will do a random act of kindness when I'm at the grocery store (not trying to get any credit, just telling you the story). If someone in front or behind me has a small basket of groceries (just a few things) I'll buy their groceries. I just tell the cashier to add it to mine. Well, last night I had a very full basket and the guy behind me had one container of oil for his car. When I mentioned to the cashier that I'd like to buy it for him the guy said, "No!" I said, "Come on. Let me buy it for you. I haven't done anything nice for anyone in a long time." Again he said, "NO" (angrily) and marched off to another aisle.

The more I thought about it, could I have embarrassed him? I didn't mean to make him feel like charity and I wasn't judging him. I just had this urge to do something nice... maybe to make me feel good? Did he think I was flirting with him? I had to walk in front of him to leave the store and I saw him talking to someone he knew. It appeared to be a friendly conversation. I felt my heart beating fast and was scared he was going to find me in the parking lot and yell at me. He didn't and everything was fine, but I'm not quite sure what to do now. Was I wrong to do what I did?

I have to keep myself in check. When I give, do I give to make me feel good or them? Lord, I pray I give for the right reason...

It made me also realize it is a LOT harder to accept Love than it is to give Love.

"We love because he first loved us." (1 John 4:19)

you smell so good

"No one after lighting a lamp puts it in a cellar or under a basket, but on a stand, so that those who enter may see the light. Your eye is the lamp of your body. When your eye is healthy, your whole body is full of light, but when it is bad, your body is full of darkness. Therefore be careful lest the light in you be darkness. If then your whole body is full of light, having no part dark, it will be wholly bright, as when a lamp with its rays gives you light." (Luke 11:33-36)

Just yesterday I was at the gym and saw a friend of mine. Well, I don't know her real well since we haven't had a lot of deep conversations (maybe we are just acquaintances?), but I could just see sadness when I looked in her eyes. I didn't want to be weird, but I really wanted to ask her where her Joy is and what's wrong? She is one of those girls in the community who are at all of the right parties. She does a lot of charity work, but for whatever reason I don't see a lot of light in her eyes.

I had never thought about how much a small candle can light up a room. I agree that you would never light one and put it under a basket or in the closet. I like mine out in the open so people can see it... especially me. I'm obsessed with candles and I really love the aromatic ones that are gentle and not too overpowering, but have a subtle different smell. One that people would want to smell, not one that people would have a bad reaction to if they are in a room with it for too long.

Lord, please help me to be healthy. Keep me motivated to want to do what is best for my body and soul. Help me to be like an aromatic candle that makes people want what makes me different. Let it start with my eyes. Make them full of Joy and just like Yours that see only the good in people. Please God, give me the courage to reach out to my friend and have a deep conversation about You.

a private concert

It doesn't get any better than this:

















I love having my own private concert. These songs were perfect tonight. I'm praying for some very special people tonight and I dedicate these songs to you.
Love,

2011 Scripture Memory Verse #7

Thinking about authenticity and motives as I'm a little late again.