a true gift

We were at the wedding of one of our closest friends' daughter last night. We had such a nice time! It was an outdoor wedding in a very beautiful setting.  Our other friend officiated the wedding so it was real nice. The father-of-the-bride used his toast as an opportunity to invite God to the wedding. It was a prayer for his daughter and her new husband. It was awesome how he brought in what really matters to him!

I had a conversation with another friend during dinner. He is newly retired. We were talking about what he wants to do in this next stage of life and about the fact that as we get older we start thinking more about our passions and our legacy. What do we care about most? How do we want to be remembered? Why are we here anyway?

Somehow we started talking about Faith. He said he is so grateful that he has been given the gift of Faith. I was surprised that after all of this time I didn't really, really, really in the depth of my soul think of it as a gift. I told him I didn't consider it a gift, but a choice. He corrected me immediately. He said there are many people who wish they had it, but don't. Right off the top of my head I thought of a few people close to me who have told me they wish they could, but don't. Usually I quickly go to a place (Forgive me, Lord, but almost judging them --> when I should have been praying for them!) where I think to myself that they will; One day God will give them reason to trust Him and surrender their life to Him because they cannot get through _____  on their own. They will have to fall to their knees one day.

I've been thinking about it all day. I spent so much time researching on my computer as if I was just diagnosed with something I knew nothing about. I was searching for knowledge. I thank God that so many of the sites I clicked on had Bible verses (I had read many times before!), proving that Faith isn't a choice, but a gift. And I have been taking it for granted my whole life!! I also learned it's best to find wisdom from His Word. I wish I would have gone there first!

Today I went from confusion to clear understanding to confusion and back to understanding again. I know Satan is the author of confusion and God is...

"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." Hebrews 12:2. 

Getting back to my legacy: Above all, I want all to know that I am rooted in Faith, confidently trusting God with every part of my life and I pray I inspire you to do the same.

"May it please the court..."

Since it happens to be Thursday...

I'm very thankful that I was able to visit my daughter in New York a couple of weeks ago. It was especially nice that we had her apartment to ourselves. I loved just spending time together and cooking some meals on Sunday with Van Morrison playing in the background and a nice candle burning.

Then last weekend I was able to fly to North Carolina to watch my son get sworn into the Bar Association. I'm very grateful for having had the opportunity to hear his sponsor say, "May it please the court...  I'm pleased to introduce John and recommend his admission to the bar."  I loved our intimate celebration with just the two of us afterwards. Oh, and I helped him move again. This is hopefully not his last move. The house is in his price-range, but he is not going to be living in the manner to which he is accustomed. We are hoping it is short-term. :)

I'm grateful for having quality time with my sister and her family. It was short and sweet, but totally worth it. They are so loving and supportive of us. I wish everyone had people in their lives who are as loving and caring as them.

I have been making it a point to learn as much as I can about my family's health history. It was quite scary when I had to fill out a form asking me to list my family members who have had health concerns. I had to list every one of my family members (dead and alive). It was enough to stop me in my tracks and make the choice to be smarter.  I'm very very grateful for my health! I just need to eliminate sugar from my diet, eat organic meats and cheese, cut down on my cheese consumption (2x weekly?!) and get back into yoga.  If I make those simple changes I should be okay! Did you know that everyone has cancer cells and they feed on sugar? Oh, and wine has a ton of sugar in it! ;)

When the approximately 400 people were sworn in, the sponsors all began by looking straight in the judge's eyes each time and said, "May it please the court, your honor..."  I couldn't help think about this song by Matt Redman, Better is One Day.

"Better is one day in Your courts... Than thousands elsewhere."  Isn't that the truth!! 

May my life and yours Please the Only One who matters!

In His Love,

A.

God is SO much bigger!

You wouldn't believe how much satan has tried to attack me since last Saturday. I've heard that happens after a conference where so many people turn toward God and trust Him with their lives. Beth spent a good portion of her message on the topic of fear. She even gave us a gift at the end of the simulcast. It was a 12 page booklet we could download for free, filled with many many verses to help equip us to use as ammunition as we battle our fear. I immediately printed it, because God knows it is something I have struggled with for years.

I was all fired up after the conference and ready to see what God was going to do through me as a result. I was at work on Monday and the second patient of my day scared me more than anyone in my entire career. I do not say that lightly. I wish I could share the entire story, but I can't. I will just say one thing. When it was all said and done, she asked me who I thought was more scared, me or her? I will say with all of my heart that I'm 99.9% sure it was me. It was terrible! 

Satan did a few other things this week as well. Honestly, some of them are still bothering me, but I need to keep my Faith that God is in charge and knows exactly what He's doing. He is so much bigger. Many people are struggling with some great big issues that are way scarier than what I experienced in my office on Monday. I'm talking huge things; trust me! 

I have to tell you that my printed copy of FEAR AND COURAGE The Great Forsake and Take was sitting right next to my printer. I had to give it to someone very dear to me last night. I didn't even have a chance to open it before I was to pass it on to someone in greater need than me. Isn't that just so God? 

I was not brought up with any knowledge of the influence of satan in my life, or of this world we live in. This week proved to me that satan is real. I have been given too many reasons to tell him to, "Back Off" and stay the you know what away from me and all of the people I love! 

This Thursday I am thankful that with God we don't have to be afraid. I'm praying for those who do not understand the depth of His love.

"Be strong and courageous; don't be terrified or afraid of them. For it is the LORD your God who goes with you; He will not leave you or forsake you." -Deuteronomy 31:6 (HCSB)

Have a great weekend,

angie xoxo

FAITH-fulness

"The Lord speaks; many many women spread the good news" (Psalm 68:11 NET)

I was blessed beyond measure by my favorite Bible teacher, Beth Moore this past Saturday. I really wanted to participate in her simulcast but didn't think it was going to be possible since I had company. My husband was going to be out of town and I was helping my friend, Meg celebrate her big birthday. I didn't want to trade my real-life friends for my computer. Something in me (The Holy Spirit and prayers from a friend) had me go ahead and sign up for it even though it was going to be a long-shot. My friends ended up leaving 15 minutes before the simulcast started. I sat all alone with no distractions in front of my computer with a pad of paper, a pen, my  Bible and a very weak internet connection. Long story, short God orchestrated a sweet meeting with Him and 150,000 other women. I could almost cry thinking about it now. He knew it was exactly what I needed.

How did Beth know my blog had turned into "by Angie" instead of "By Faith... Angie?" God spoke so clearly through her.  I realize I've been plowing through life this past year or so, acting as if I am "just fine." Well, you know what? I"m not "just fine, " although it may appear that way if you look at my FB page. It reminds me of a time just before the bottom fell out of my life back in 1993. I remember telling my sister how unhappy I was, although I had everything. I had the husband, two beautiful kids (the boy & the girl), a golden retriever, a good job, a beautiful house, took many trips and basically had a great life (from the world's perspective). I felt like I should have been content, but it wasn't long after that, that I learned my life as I knew it was ending. Who would have known? God did... and He more than carried me through that rough season. As I look back I couldn't have gotten a better gift. He was and still is the perfect gift. I didn't even know He was what was missing in my life.

Fast forward...  I've been trying to convince myself that I was "just fine" after I lost my mom, my job and then my brother. I also lost my forties. Since then I have been jumping from one thing to another with a fake smile on my face.  When I look at a picture taken at our new cottage (my dream come true!) I can't help think I should be "just fine" and appreciate all I have. Don't get me wrong, I do love it; I've had an amazing Summer. I'm praying we will make many memories there and I hope one day I will watch my grandchildren play there, God-willing.  But there is more to life than having everything I want. Because if I have everything I want than I need a bigger life. I need to get out of myself and start serving others!! This isn't about being content either. It's about sharing the love of Christ.

I had lost my desire to share what God is doing in my life. I let satan convince me that nobody really cares if I share my stories about what He's doing in my life. I let fear and approval stop me from writing.

Beth spoke to all women, A-Z.  She prayed over each one of us. I know that sounds strange through a computer, but I received it. I want to put the Faith back into my life and my blog. I don't ever want to stop looking for God. He still performs miracles and I'm going to keep asking. I believe He can heal my heart from the losses. He will never leave or forsake us. And, I don't want to be "just fine." I want way more!

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." (John 10:10)




In Christ Alone,
A.

free - changed forever

He knows and He cares

Time doesn't heal... God does.

xoxo