My Grandparents

 I cannot describe my grandparents because they were all gone before I was old enough to know them. Not a single memory. 

All I remember is hearing my Dad's dad died when he was about two years old. He didn't talk about him much because apparently it would make his mom too upset. My dad didn't really talk about either of his parents. I heard that growing up they weren't allowed to talk at the dinner table... and he never heard his parents tell him they loved him. It is really sad. I'm not sure when his mom died, but it was before I was alive or when I was a newborn. 

My poor mom thought she was responsible for her own mom's death and she lived with guilt her whole life. I am not kidding. Her mom (Matilda) died when she was about twelve years old. At that time my mom was probably hormonal and said she wished her mom would just die. And she did. She was the baby of the family by ten years. Actually, my dad was also a baby by ten years. They were both "bonus" children, although I don't think they thought about it that way back then. I'm sure there was some sibling rivalry because they may have been a bit spoiled (well, for sure my mom, but not so sure about my dad). I think there was a wicked stepmother when her dad remarried. I heard stories that that was one of the reasons my parents married so young; she wanted to get out of the house because of her. I'm not sure when her dad passed away either, but before I was old enough to remember.

I always wished I had grandparents in my life. Friends always seemed to talk so highly about theirs and I feel like I missed out on something important because I didn't have any. I think that's why I want to be in my grandchildren's life. 

My mom wasn't the super nice kind of grandmother I wished she would be with my kids. I can't blame her though, because she didn't know what she was doing. She did the best she could. I don't remember her baking cookies with them, or spending a lot of quality time with them. Although Grandma and Papa did take each of the grandchildren on a 6-year-trip which was a week-long vacation. Meghan wanted to come home early from hers since she missed me and my mom loved that she wanted to "smell" me. My dad, Papa was quiet and reserved and a man of few words. Honestly, I don't think my mom let him get a word in edgewise. Again, they did the best they could. 

At the time of this writing I have two grandsons who live in Seattle. Ford will be five on Halloween and Rudy will be three on October 10th. Luckily I am able to see them quite often and I hope they'll remember me and that I'll be the kind of grandmother I wish I had. So far, I think it's going well. 

If you are reading this I hope you spend a lot of time with your grandparents when you have the opportunity. And really listen to their stories because later you'll wish you did, and it might be too late. And, after they are gone... keep talking about them and keep their memory alive. 

My Childhood Vacations

 The most memorable vacations from my childhood involved camping and rain in a station wagon without seatbelts and sitting on the hump. My first plane ride was when I was eighteen years old when I went with my brother, Chris to visit my brother, Dave and his wife, Connie in Texas. But back to the camping...

The most memorable camping trip was when our family of nine went to Florida. I was young, so I don't remember all where we went, but I can picture the long yellow tent we had. There was always sand in it and I'm pretty sure it was hot and I could always hear mosquitoes buzzing in my ear and having to go to community bathrooms. But most of all, I remember it being fun. One memorable thing about that trip is that my oldest sister, Vic, had crocheted a bikini bathing suit and my dad flipped out. 

I also remember going to the sand dunes a lot. We had old videos of us running down the hill and we had a blast. It was pretty funny how our mom dressed us three little girls in matching pajamas and they were super cute. 

I'm not sure when we graduated to the kind of camper that the sides slid out. Again, my memory involves rain and sand and mosquitoes and a lot of fun! We camped on Easter but I have no recollection of where we camped, but it usually rained. I am NOT complaining; it was a simple life. There is nothing quite like camping. I love sitting by the fire at night and waking up to the smell of bacon cooking in the morning. 

Oh, a fun memory I just remembered is when we rented a houseboat and took it to Lake Cumberland with Aunt Winnie and Uncle Joe. I think the older kids were out of the house, so it was just my sister, DeNaze and Mary (Goose). Nase, did you go? Pretty sure you did. ;) Anyway, I think it was a week long trip. We stopped along the shore at night and it was awesome! 

Our parents loved to take cruises and oftentimes left us kids alone. That would never fly these days! Whatever the case, I am positive that their love of travel passed down to me, because as an adult I have traveled to many many wonderful places and I am very blessed. I will continue to travel until I can't. 

Hopefully I won't be camping though. 

Songs bring back Memories

 I love music. When I was in high school I always fell asleep to it and woke up when a favorite song came on my radio sitting on the table next to my bed. To this day I still love music and songs can take me right back to where I was back then. During stressful times I could hide away in the music even when they were played on the lowest volume. 

The first song of my first memory is "Brand New Key" by Melanie. We lived on East Street in Fenton and I remember hearing it. I still love it and it's always part of our "dance parties." 

I love turning love songs into Christian songs and making them into love songs from God to me. 

I  love hearing people's favorite songs and making playlists of my music every year. When I am on my deathbed there better be music playing constantly.

I think I'll list a few songs with the memories attached (In no particular order):

If You Leave Me Now... by Chicago (Dave Lamb from high school told me to always think of him when I hear it after I broke up with him. He got his next girlfriend pregnant. I still think of him every single time.)

Do Ya Think I'm Sexy... by Rod Stewart. It was a song that Colin Grahl sang to me over the phone and all of my friends had fun with it, especially at the prom. :)

Babe... by Styx. My break-up song when Dennis Reuther broke up with me... Most likely because I told him I would only have sex with my spouse. I loved his family a lot and his mom taught me so much about life and was so very special to me. I always think of him when I hear that song. 

The Greatest Love of All... by Whitney Houston. I still feel badly because for some reason I felt the need to steal the c.d. from my employer. I cannot believe I did it. That song fed my soul after a "Choice" weekend retreat. I still love the lyrics. Imagine stealing a c.d. after a church retreat. OMG. 

Time After Time... by Placido Domingo The song I danced to with my first husband at our wedding.

The Greatest Discovery... by Elton John reminds me of when I just had John and introduced Meghan to him.

Leaving on a Jet Plane... by Peter, Paul and Mary reminds me of the morning my sister, Vic passed away. I had to tell Mom and Dad that she died. She paved the way and taught me NOT to be afraid to die. 

Angie... by The Rolling Stones... a lot of memories. A ton of memories. 

Just for You... by REO Speedwagon. My first date with my husband when we went to their concert and it was the song we danced to at our wedding. We had a rocky start. We dated for two years and were engaged for two years before we got married. 

In Christ Alone... The song reminds me of my first Bible study with Beth Moore and even though she doesn't know me, she taught me to trust in God alone. We played it at my mom's funeral too. 

Sunshine on My Shoulders by John Denver will always make me think of my friend, Reg... who just one week before she had her stroke told me she wants it played at her funeral. 

I could go on with the memories forever. It seems all music brings back memories in a deep way. I cannot imagine life without music.

My Favorite Store As A Kid

When I was a little girl I loved candy. As luck would have it my parents had us run down to John Grier's Store to buy them a pack of cigarettes (this would never happen these days!) and they had a great selection of candy. It was when we lived on the corner of East and High Street in Fenton. I think it was a little thank- you gift/bribe to be able to buy a piece of candy for myself (but did I really have a choice; I think not!). I can't imagine how it would have gone if I refused to do it. I probably wouldn't be living to tell this story; funny-not funny!

 If you asked if I ever stole anything in my life, I would have to tell you that I did it twice. Maybe I'll tell you about the other thing I stole later (insert wink emoji). Once I stole a candy bar from a store that was by the old high school (can't remember the name) and I got caught. Anyway, I blocked out the memory about how it was handled, but the punishment must have worked because I still remember it all of these years later. I'm pretty sure it was a Snickers bar, which was my favorite. Truth be told I am not picky. 

To this day I still love candy... any kind of candy and I have to fight the temptation more often than you can imagine. Good thing I decided to become a dental hygienist!

Keepsakes + Family Heirlooms

The first question in my book was centered around keepsakes and family heirlooms and I find it pretty funny. Anyone who knows me well knows I don't like to save a lot of stuff, and I enjoy purging more than collecting. I have been known to say, "If I can't wear it or eat it I don't need it." To date I have lived in the same house for 38 years. It could be filled with a ton of extra stuff but I'm pretty much a minimalist and can't handle a lot of extra stuff. I have several bins of photos though, and that stresses me out. 

 I think previous generations cared more about keepsakes than mine and I'm pretty sure it's because they have lived through a Depression and they really know the value of a dollar. My dad collected elephants and my mom gave me a fancy cream and sugar (another story!) that she loved more than me. Now that they are gone, I like them a little more but don't tell anyone... I don't hold them near to my heart. I love that they loved them though. 

 I have decided that at 62 years old, I only want to be surrounded by things that bring me Joy. I remember several years ago challenging myself to not buy any clothing for a solid year. I kept my promise to myself and only broke it once and it was worth it. I had to go to my daughter Meghan's surprise 30th birthday party hosted by my ex-husband and his wife. Trust me when I say that I had to look and feel my best that day. I bought a jumpsuit that I wore several different ways. But all in all I enjoyed the challenge and found it pretty easy. 

 If I really think about family heirlooms, I'm hoping my gold bracelet turns into one and gets passed down to Meghan and I'm hoping John will want a diamond for someone special one day. But again, these are just "things." I read this question the other day and tried hard thinking about something that really means a lot to me. I love the baby ring with Meghan's initials on it and I love John's Hustle Award that he received at basketball camp. I think they might have both already taken them and they aren't even mine anyway. Ha! If the house was on fire I would try my hardest to get my first Bible with all of my notes in it. The binding is shattered and it is held together by some Michigan State tape.