Happy Thanksgiving!
The house is quiet. My husband is sound asleep and I'm about to start the Thanksgiving preparation. The Holy Spirit brought me down to my office to stop and pause... to remember.
It's too easy for me to focus on the yesterdays, the if only's and the whys? I remember so many holidays where my mom would be more concerned about who wasn't there instead of who was there. My second to the oldest sister had moved to California and it totally broke my mom's heart. It's a long, complicated story, but I remember my mom having this underlying stress that seemed to consume her because of it; she wasn't able to fully enjoy the holiday. She was on edge and could seriously cry at the drop of a hat. She had a hard time not taking it out on those of us present, especially my dad. I'd by lying if I didn't admit that I became a little bitter toward my sister for what felt like abandoning our family. I wonder if she has any idea how much it affected the rest of us.
It is so ironic that what seems like just a few years later, our family has shrunk. The crazy, busy holidays are just a memory. My daughter is in California and she isn't going to be here. Instead she will be home for Christmas. The only family member outside of my immediate family (Linc and John) will be the same sister (and her friend) who I mentioned above. Although it will be such a small gathering today, I want to fully enjoy those who are present.
I'm so Grateful that although Meghan won't be here, I know to the depth of my soul that we have an amazing relationship. I know she didn't move to CA to run away from me and she has reminded me of that a zillion times. God has given me so much and I don't take any of it for granted. I could list the many gifts He has given me but He knows what's in my heart.
Wherever you are today, I pray you have nothing but laughter and Peace in your house. Forgive anyone you need to forgive, and try to be Mary instead of Martha! ;)
So much love,
Angie
